Planning is Partnering with God

I’m not a planner by nature. I enjoy allowing the day to unfold as it will, leaning into what I feel great about, and avoiding the things that aren’t vibing with how I feel. I don’t like feeling boxed in or being bossed around by a to-do list. I’d much rather feel my way through the day!

The problem is that our feelings often lead us astray if we allow them to be the driver. 

I have a holy calling, a purpose given to me by God himself. When I don’t prioritize that in my life because of circumstances or how I’m feeling, I’m allowing myself to become an idol that keeps me from serving and worshiping Him wholeheartedly. 

It’s easy to put things off, again and again, until they don’t get done. 

When we pass doing what we’re supposed to in favor of doing what we want, we’re rolling a snowball down the hill. It continues getting larger until it’s unwieldy and out of control. 

Psalm 90:12 says “Teach us to number our days, that we may present to you a heart of wisdom.”

We learn to number our days from His instruction, allowing us to gain wisdom that we can then give back to him with our whole heart. When we understand that this life is finite, and that everything we do is for His glory, we can get on the same page with what God is doing. 

Planning is my way of participating in God’s plan for my life. My allowing space and time on the calendar for what He’s called me to do.

By looking at my planner, I can tell if I’m agreeing with God or walking contrary to the purpose he’s given me. Right now, my purpose is wife, mama, homeschool teacher, coach. Are these roles reflected in what I plan to do this week?

How Do We Plan?

There’s no one right way to plan, except consistently. Whatever works for you is a great place to start. Planning is also a fluid thing – it’s not rigid. Don’t be afraid to start one way and switch to another as you practice.

I start by brain-dumping everything in my head. Our brains aren’t meant to hold all our information. We quite often use them as filing cabinets instead, which slows us down and can leave us feeling paralyzed with information overload. 

You know how your computer runs slower when you have all those tabs open in a few different browsers? Our brains are the same. We’ve got to clean up the mental clutter, and a big brain dump helps us to let go of all those little things taking up valuable space because we can trust they will get done when they’re on paper. 

When I brain-dump, I get everything out – from the household tasks that need to be done to the big picture items that God has called me to. 

Often, once we get all the things that must be done out of our head, we realize many of the tasks are quick action items, and many aren’t urgent after all. They just felt heavy and urgent because they were occupying valuable brain space. 

Most likely there will also be a few things in your brain dump that are either too large to be completed as is, or a vague idea of something that needs to be done. 

Here, you can break that big item into smaller, actionable items to move towards completion. “Clean out the closet” can feel daunting and leave this on your to do list for weeks when you don’t know where to start. Instead, try putting the smaller steps down: “Go through sock drawer, remove dresses that don’t fit anymore, donate shoes I no longer wear, etc”

When you’ve finished your brain dump, now you just need to decide what needs to be done when. Look at the calendar and your personal responsibilities, and decide where there’s time to complete these tasks. 

When you assign a time, stick to it, and show up at that time ready to complete the task at hand!

What We Do With the Plan Matters

We can’t just stop at planning. Most importantly, am I actually showing up to do what I’ve planned? 

When we keep our word to ourselves, we’re agreeing with what we’re called to be. We’re showing up for our life purpose filled and ready to partner with God. When we don’t show up, when we push things off arbitrarily, we’re giving our circumstances and feelings more weight. Each time we slide into this, it becomes a little easier to do so the next time. We’re creating a path in our brain that is easier and easier to default to. 

What we plan is important, but how we show up is even more so. 

Do what you set out to do. Keep your word to yourself. As you continue to show up, your brain learns you can be trusted. You follow through. You partner with God on the mission He’s set before you, and in taking these little steps faithfully, you continue to bring Him glory. 

Are you keeping your word to yourself or do you continually deflect what you should be doing in favor of what feels good at the time? How will you show up and stand in the mission God has called you to right here?

According to Healthline, it’s estimated that you have over 6,000 thoughts a day – or about 6.5 thoughts each minute while you’re awake.

Our brains are always active and working, providing us input on the world around us and our perceptions of it. Many of these 6.5 thoughts a minute are subconscious, and whether we know it or not, they are shaping our lives.

If we want to change where we are, it is essential to understand what’s actually going on in our brains.

While it’s impossible to document every single thought, we can intentionally spend time each day connecting with our minds and putting to paper what’s floating around in there. The morning is an excellent time to write down your thoughts and see what’s actually going on.

Grab a journal, blank piece of paper, or open a blank Google doc – whatever works best for you. There’s no one way to journal. You only need a space to free-write all the thoughts swirling around in your brain. Find somewhere comfortable, and settle in.

Starting at the top of the page, just begin writing what’s on your mind. If the blank page is intimidating, start with the weather or how you slept the night before. Once you get some words down, it usually begins to flow.

Whatever comes to mind, write it down. The grocery list. Something you’re anxious about. An event you’re looking forward to. How you’re struggling with one of your children’s attitudes. Whatever comes up, write it down and keep going!

Before we go any further, though, I want to caution you about a pitfall most of us fall victim to every now and then.

When we uncover thoughts that aren’t the most pleasant, we’re tempted to do one of two things:

1. Rewrite them with a positive spin before we even write them down OR
2. Shame ourselves for thinking a “bad” thought

To understand our minds more, we have to be curious. All thoughts are allowed. There are no “bad” or “good” thoughts – only thoughts.

Being honest with yourself during this process will help you to move forward in the direction you want. When we cover up these thoughts with either avoiding them or burying ourselves in guilt, it does nothing to process them productively and move forward.

It just buries them deeply, and we will continue thinking them unchecked.

This process is helpful for actually seeing what you’re thinking. Our thought patterns are well worn and we often don’t even know what’s creating the things that are frustrating us.

When we take the time to get curious with our thoughts, we can see how we’re giving away our power, how we’re playing the victim, how we are waiting for circumstances to change, and how we’re contributing to our pain.

Whether or not they are true, it doesn’t matter. What we give thought space to, we allow to grow.

If you’re ready to start intentionally taking your thoughts captive and creating the world you desire, The Busy Mom’s Guide to Generating Joy is a perfect first step. This practical 11-page downloadable PDF is available to you instantly, and it’s HALF OFF right now!

This guide includes the 5 step process of creating more joy, journal prompts and space to put your thoughts on paper, and bonus ideas of new thoughts to practice. You can use it over and over again as you grow in renewing your mind!

Are your thoughts creating results you like? If not, what are you going to do moving forward?

When we look to motherhood for validation, it’s not here. There are beautiful, hard-won moments, sure, but for the majority of the time, you feel unfit and lacking wisdom for the job ahead. 

It’s why we look to others for advice, for how-tos. We seek out those who seem to have it together more than we do and copy what they’re doing. 

In reality, none of us know what we’re doing. And there’s no one right way to be a mom. Just as we’re all gifted with individual personalities and gifts, we show up to motherhood with unique perspectives and ways to navigate. Different isn’t wrong. Hard isn’t bad.

The things I write at Mom Life by Design aren’t a how-to manual, because I deeply believe one can’t be written. Nor is there one way to do this thing. It’s a joining of hands, a word of encouragement, a shift of perspective. It’s pushing the reset on this one wild life you’ve been given and learning to lean into the one who entrusted you with your children.

In Him is the only place our validation comes, and even then, it’s not because of our works. It’s because of His goodness that we can be good. 

If you’re weary, at the end of your rope, or feeling like you’re the biggest hot mess there ever was, you’re in the right place. My prayer is this site won’t tell you the to-dos you need, but it will remind you of who you are. And whose you are. 

And that, friend, is just what my tired mom heart needs to keep on.

One way I’ve been able to use self-care to renew my mind on motherhood is by practicing positive affirmations. There are things every mom needs to hear, and by repeating them to ourselves, we are able to focus on what we want to create in our lives. There’s power in our words, and when we choose to speak life to ourselves daily, it brings to life the attitudes and responses we desire to cultivate.

We don’t have to wait for others to speak truth and life into our day because we can do it for ourselves. What we think often becomes our reality, and our inner voice can often not be kind. It’s important that we retrain ourselves to speak positively and kindly, as we are the only people we will spend the entirety of our lives with.

I’ve found that pocket cards help me to remember my focus, and allow me to always have truth at hand.

I’d love to share 16 printable affirmation cards with you to encourage you on the journey. Grab your free printable affirmation cards of things every mom needs to hear below!

Keep the truth close at hand.

It’s easy for moms to get stuck in negative thought patterns in the middle of the mundane. Print these affirmations to remind yourself of these important truths, no matter where you are or what you’re doing.

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