Planning is Partnering with God

I’m not a planner by nature. I enjoy allowing the day to unfold as it will, leaning into what I feel great about, and avoiding the things that aren’t vibing with how I feel. I don’t like feeling boxed in or being bossed around by a to-do list. I’d much rather feel my way through the day!

The problem is that our feelings often lead us astray if we allow them to be the driver. 

I have a holy calling, a purpose given to me by God himself. When I don’t prioritize that in my life because of circumstances or how I’m feeling, I’m allowing myself to become an idol that keeps me from serving and worshiping Him wholeheartedly. 

It’s easy to put things off, again and again, until they don’t get done. 

When we pass doing what we’re supposed to in favor of doing what we want, we’re rolling a snowball down the hill. It continues getting larger until it’s unwieldy and out of control. 

Psalm 90:12 says “Teach us to number our days, that we may present to you a heart of wisdom.”

We learn to number our days from His instruction, allowing us to gain wisdom that we can then give back to him with our whole heart. When we understand that this life is finite, and that everything we do is for His glory, we can get on the same page with what God is doing. 

Planning is my way of participating in God’s plan for my life. My allowing space and time on the calendar for what He’s called me to do.

By looking at my planner, I can tell if I’m agreeing with God or walking contrary to the purpose he’s given me. Right now, my purpose is wife, mama, homeschool teacher, coach. Are these roles reflected in what I plan to do this week?

How Do We Plan?

There’s no one right way to plan, except consistently. Whatever works for you is a great place to start. Planning is also a fluid thing – it’s not rigid. Don’t be afraid to start one way and switch to another as you practice.

I start by brain-dumping everything in my head. Our brains aren’t meant to hold all our information. We quite often use them as filing cabinets instead, which slows us down and can leave us feeling paralyzed with information overload. 

You know how your computer runs slower when you have all those tabs open in a few different browsers? Our brains are the same. We’ve got to clean up the mental clutter, and a big brain dump helps us to let go of all those little things taking up valuable space because we can trust they will get done when they’re on paper. 

When I brain-dump, I get everything out – from the household tasks that need to be done to the big picture items that God has called me to. 

Often, once we get all the things that must be done out of our head, we realize many of the tasks are quick action items, and many aren’t urgent after all. They just felt heavy and urgent because they were occupying valuable brain space. 

Most likely there will also be a few things in your brain dump that are either too large to be completed as is, or a vague idea of something that needs to be done. 

Here, you can break that big item into smaller, actionable items to move towards completion. “Clean out the closet” can feel daunting and leave this on your to do list for weeks when you don’t know where to start. Instead, try putting the smaller steps down: “Go through sock drawer, remove dresses that don’t fit anymore, donate shoes I no longer wear, etc”

When you’ve finished your brain dump, now you just need to decide what needs to be done when. Look at the calendar and your personal responsibilities, and decide where there’s time to complete these tasks. 

When you assign a time, stick to it, and show up at that time ready to complete the task at hand!

What We Do With the Plan Matters

We can’t just stop at planning. Most importantly, am I actually showing up to do what I’ve planned? 

When we keep our word to ourselves, we’re agreeing with what we’re called to be. We’re showing up for our life purpose filled and ready to partner with God. When we don’t show up, when we push things off arbitrarily, we’re giving our circumstances and feelings more weight. Each time we slide into this, it becomes a little easier to do so the next time. We’re creating a path in our brain that is easier and easier to default to. 

What we plan is important, but how we show up is even more so. 

Do what you set out to do. Keep your word to yourself. As you continue to show up, your brain learns you can be trusted. You follow through. You partner with God on the mission He’s set before you, and in taking these little steps faithfully, you continue to bring Him glory. 

Are you keeping your word to yourself or do you continually deflect what you should be doing in favor of what feels good at the time? How will you show up and stand in the mission God has called you to right here?

I’m grateful for this life I get to create. I still feel like sometimes I have the hustle mindset, that I have to work to be worth something. That my day has to be so full of things. But if my day is full of love, connection, and presence, isn’t that worth more?

The to-do list is long. Being a family of growing boys keeps the calendar full – check-ups, orthodontist appointments, sports practices, cross country meets, counseling, meet-ups with friends. There’s always food to think about as they consume more than ever to keep up with the previous list.

From the moment I wake up, I feel this tug to make the most of the day, to write out an ambitious to-do list that will leave me feeling accomplished by the end of the day. As a homeschooling mom, I spend a large portion of my day at home, and it’s like my brain refuses to recognize that this alone is hard and holy work. Instead, I need to prove myself by checking off all the to-dos I can fit into a day.

This hustle mindset that has taken over the business world has taken over my heart too, and if I’m not careful, it will choke out all the good things in my life, leaving me an empty, tired shell of myself.

I’m learning more and more each day that my worth isn’t tied to what I accomplish. Life is not about how much I do. This is my heart looking for a cheap and easy way to say to the world: “Look at me and how much I’ve done! Validate me!”

That validation never comes. Any praise from those closest to me quickly fades in a flash and I’m hustling after it again.

The truth is, friends, our worth doesn’t come from what we do, but is already built in us. We’re looking to the wrong places to remind us who and whose we are.

When the world says do more, God says rest.
When the world says prove yourself, God says you are worth everything to me just as you are.
When the world says you aren’t enough, God says I am enough, and I am in you and with you.
When the world says you aren’t contributing, God says I’ve created you for just where you are.

Planning your day is so important. Getting things out of your head and onto paper (or digital paper if you’re anything like me) clears all that clutter in our brains and allows us more space to be present, to learn and to grow.

If we’re not careful, though, that planning can put us in hustle mode, where the to-do list is king and there’s no space for presence. Staying busy is a great way to avoid feeling our feelings and working through them. I know this, because this is me.

When things get hard, or tough emotions are churning inside me, I double down on the actionables and get busy. If I stay focused on tasks, I don’t have to be uncomfortable and feel hard things that seem like they will last forever.

I work myself into a frenzy, exhaust all my reserves, and then lash out at those around me from the pain of those unprocessed emotions. It’s not a pretty cycle, but my mind has an old, well-worn pattern that this is better than actually feeling the hard stuff.

In reality, I’m just stuffing those emotions down deeper, where eventually they will come spewing out in the most unloving ways to those around me. Festering emotions store up all kinds of problems – they work to be seen and recognized, and when not acknowledged, can wreak havoc on our physical and mental wellbeing. They have a message for you, and won’t stop until you slow down to hear it.

While your emotions aren’t always truth-tellers, they do have a message for you. You can’t control how you feel – but you can gently acknowledge and allow them, thank them for trying to help you, and listen to the most loving message they have for you. After you feel those emotions and allow them to pass through, you can determine how you want to feel moving froward, and create thoughts that support this new feeling.

You can’t think your way out of feeling emotions – that’s the hard, slow work we have to be present for. As a growing, thriving human, we have access to the full range of emotions – the joy-filled, the grief-stricken, the anger-fueled. No emotion is bad, it just is. When we allow it to be felt and carry its message to us, they can move on.

Don’t dam up your emotions until there’s a breach. Allow them to flow freely. With practice, this becomes easier. You become more in tune with yourself and how you feel, and it feels less catastrophic to process them through. They aren’t here to hurt you, but to guide you along your path.

If you’re anything like me, you’ve had those thoughts that send you into a downward spiral.

If only this happened…
If only he changed this…
If I only got this thing…

That’s dangerous thinking.

You’re giving your power away.

What if I told you that you had the power to create the life you want to live?

You can stop this cycle of waiting for circumstances or people or jobs to change, and instead grab peace and joy with both hands, right in the messy middle?

You’re not a victim to circumstances. I get that things feel hard right now. And life is full of hard, painful, trying times. That will never change.

What can change, what you have control of, are the thoughts you are telling yourself that result in your feelings, which guide your actions.

The Bible tells us plainly to take every thought captive (put the reference here). Our thoughts will take us on a journey – one that we may not want to take. Friends, if no one has ever told you, you’re allowed to think different thoughts.

I know this sounds simple – almost too simple. But the proof is in the practice. And while it’s a simple idea, the execution can feel like an uphill battle.

Our brain likes those smooth, well-worn worry pathways we’ve created. It’s comfortable in what it’s always known. And when we begin to try to blaze a new trail, you’re going to need the machete to clear out the overgrowth.

First, we have to realize the old thoughts that are leading us places we don’t want to go. How are you feeling that you don’t want to feel? (Frustrated, overwhelmed, stressed, like a bad mom?) What thoughts are you having that are leading to those feelings? (I should be/shouldn’t be…)

Quite often, we’ve created a manual for how we think people are supposed to be/act in certain situations, either for ourselves or for others. And when we look on our circumstances with these manuals, it can create tension. We create these should’s/should not’s for these situations and when we don’t perform as expected, we fail.

What if you stopped should-ing on yourself? There is no one way to live this life. There is no right or wrong. All emotions are allowed, and we get to submit them to God and trust him for each step.

When we challenge these old patterns, it’s difficult. They may feel true, because you’ve been telling them to yourself for so long. But is it really true?

We don’t leave space in our lives for things that aren’t true. We think on what is true, holy, noble, and worthy. We adjust our thoughts to be in line with God and his word, and move forward in His truth.

It’s hard, holy work, and oh so worth it. The life you want is within your reach and waiting for you. You get to create it starting with your intentional thoughts.

If you want some ideas of intentional thoughts to practice, grab this free list as my gift to you.

What thoughts are most prevalent in your mind right now? What reality is this creating for you? Is this who you want to be?

“Search for the Lord and for his strength; continually seek him. Remember the wonders he has performed, his miracles, and the rulings he has given, you children of his servant Abraham, you descendants of Jacob, his chosen ones. He is the Lord our God. His justice is seen throughout the land.” – Psalms 105:4-7

In difficult times, we grapple with the “why’s.” Why is this happening? Why would God allow this? Why me? Why now?

We may never know the answer to the why. And the WHY is never as important as the WHO.

Who is with me and for me? Who is working all things for my good? Who is the one constant in this ever-changing world? Who goes before me and behind me? Who has all the answers? It’s a Sunday School answer – we know God is all of these and more.

While we know the truth of God’s work and character, it’s easy to forget. Forgetfulness leads to seeking our security in people and things that let us down and leave us empty.

Everywhere you look, there is evidence of His work. His justice and mercy are on display in every flower, raindrop, and face – gentle reminders of who is holding everything together, even when it feels like everything is falling apart.

Nothing else we try to put in God’s place – money, security, love, news, friendship, addictions, food – nothing will give us lasting strength. Our strength comes from Him – who He is, and remembering what He has done, because we know He is still the same today.

We don’t search for the Lord because He is hard to find. He never changes. We search for the Lord because we are a forgetful people who seek lords other than Him.

Continue to search for the Lord – He is near and will be found. Remind yourself of what He has done and the mission He has given you. As we seek and remember Him, we’re equipped with His strength to keep pressing on.

“No, O people, the Lord has told you what is good, and this is what he requires of you: to do what is right, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God.” – Micah 6:8

Right now, most of us find ourselves attempting to navigate uncharted waters. Our routines are upside down, responsibilities are scrambled, and living hour by hour is unsettling. There’s a new take on the news every hour, everything feels so divided, and jobs look completely different than they did last month, if they’re even still there. We’re forced to keep extra plates spinning in our already full hands.

With expectations pressing in from every side, as we add more and more, it’s easy to be buried under the weight of it all. We see what others are doing and wonder if we’re doing enough? Am I good enough?

We’re asking the wrong questions. Friend, we will never be enough to meet the demands of the world. And thankfully, that’s not the standard we’re held to.

God isn’t asking for perfection. He’s asking for our presence. He is walking with us as we seek to do the right thing, in kindness and humility.

In our jobs.

In our families.

In our communities.

In our staying home.

In our social media interactions.

What if we threw off the inferred expectations of the people around us and looked to Jesus instead? What does it look like for YOU, right now, right where you are, to do what is right, with kindness and a humble heart?

“You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in you, all whose thoughts are fixed on you!” – Isaiah 26:3

The world is weighing heavily on my shoulders. For some, current situations are only a matter of inconvenience. For many others, it’s so much more. My heart grieves for the injustice and disunity. I’m desperately torn between listening and learning, engaging and keeping my eyes and heart open. My heart is broken understanding we are so far from where we want to be and there’s so much work to be done. I’m exhausted knowing it takes time, dedication, and commitment for centuries-old walls to begin to crack.

This worried churning of my mind stirs up anxiety and uncertainty. It’s an indicator that I’m trusting in myself. My misplaced trust in myself sets everyone up for failure.

This entire burden is not mine to carry.

I can worry about the world, or I can trust that He holds the world in His hands and has given me a specific job to do.

Peace comes from knowing who to trust. Even with my best intentions, my help is only a drop in the bucket to what is needed. This doesn’t mean that I sit idly by and do nothing, only that I’m not to be trusted with the entire burden of the world.

My love for God propels me to do what I can, and trust that God’s love is big enough for the whole world. He’s writing a story bigger than we can see or imagine. We get to be a small part of what He’s doing.

When you feel overwhelmed by the weight of the world, fix your mind on Him. He will guide you to your next step, and can be trusted with the rest. We have peace because of who He is, not because of our circumstances.

Where are your thoughts fixed? Are they caught up in the darkness of the days, fueled by every new report? What step will you take to fix your thoughts on Him? What is He asking YOU to do as part of this story He’s writing?

“Jesus replied, “I am the bread of life. Whoever comes to me will never be hungry again. Whoever believes in me will never be thirsty.” – John 6:35

Part of my Sabbath routine is making a loaf of bread. There is something so satisfying and therapeutic in taking ordinary ingredients and with a little time, watching them transform into something both life-sustaining and delicious.

Bread has been a standard for life for a long time. For basic survival needs, even from the harshest captors, bread has been the provided source of nourishment. Bread is simple and satisfies hunger.

Just before Jesus tells His disciples that He is the bread of life, He has physically fed thousands of people who had gathered from a single portion. These people were here because they had heard of the miracles He was doing, and they wanted to see for themselves. They had a physical hunger that was satisfied, and they went away understanding they had a deeper hunger.

I can’t help but notice the compassionate way that Jesus meets the physical needs of the people, even though He has the answer to their greatest need. They are able to understand more about WHO He is after they experience HOW He cares about their basic needs.

When Jesus says He is the bread of life, He is acknowledging His ability to satisfy a hunger much greater than the physical. Our spiritual hunger is a deep need to know the One we were created for and to trust Him completely.

Once we taste of His goodness, we will never hunger again. When we trust Jesus with our life, we can have the confidence that He is always at work.

As we seek to share the bread of life to those around us, how are we first meeting those basic needs they may have? What is one way you can provide both “bread” and share the bread of life with someone today?

“Those who live in the shelter of the Most High will find rest in the shadow of the Almighty. This I declare about the Lord: He alone is my refuge, my place of safety; he is my God, and I trust him.” -Psalm 91:1-2

In these times of waiting and uncertainty, peace and rest can feel just out of reach or an impossible dream.

Whatever your typical reality, it’s easy to be comfortable and feel in control there. We’ve all been shifted into new, unfamiliar territory, and any sense of control over our life is greatly diminished. Feelings of anxiousness, helplessness, sadness, anger, confusion, loss, and so much more are normal. 

However, feelings come and go. They are indicators, not truth. Like the check engine light, they can tell us when something isn’t quite right, allowing us to stop for reflection and adjust according to what is true. 

A great question right now is to ask yourself what are you finding shelter in? Are you trying to build a temporary shelter of extra supplies and a full pantry? Are you bolstering your roof with all the news and information you can gather? Is your go-to distraction, consuming Netflix and social media around the clock? 

None of these things last. None of them provide an impermeable shelter. They will never be enough to provide you rest. They will cause you to keep striving, to work harder, to trust in what can fail. And while we may have FELT in control before, the truth is He has always been and will always be King. 

Today, I choose to remind myself of these truths: God alone is my refuge. He is my safe place. In Him I can find peace and rest. He will never fail, and I will trust him. 

Check in with yourself today. What are your feelings indicating? What are you trusting to be your shelter? What truth can you meditate on today to realign yourself to find peace and rest in Him?

Mom brain is a very real thing. 

Moms are in charge of remembering all the things. What snacks we need. Appointments. Special homework assignments. Who’s struggling with what. Which child needs extra emotional support. Birthdays. Favorite things.

With all these things floating around in a mom’s head, it’s easy to see why our minds feel cluttered, overwhelmed, and exhausted.

In addition to being sleep deprived, moms also typically wear many hats, flowing from one job to another without a break, until heads hit pillows. Some days, my schedule looks a little like this.

Whew. I know you relate. Some of you are juggling lots of developmental ages. Some have a commute (when the world is normal-ish). I’m grateful to be able to always work from home! The lines get blurred between work and home, which is why my schedule can look like a disaster, but I’m grateful to always be around. 

Spiritual Mom Brain: Multi-Tasking

With all the multi-tasking and continual working, it’s easy to see why it’s hard to get our brains to shift into a lower gear and slow down to focus on God’s word. It takes a lot of work, and I want to resist adding more hard things to my already difficult life. But this one is worth it, and the more we practice, the more we train our brains to focus in. You’ll even start to enjoy it and see the benefits flow into other areas of your life. 

I can hear your protests already. I get it. I’m the queen of losing focus, of bouncing from one task to another without even thinking. While I wrote the above paragraph, I sent a few work emails, got lost in the Facebook time warp, set a few to-dos, and contemplated the schedule for today. Singluar focus is something I have a VERY hard time with, but it’s been proven over and over again to increase the function of our brains. And I can bet we’d all love a little more of that in our lives.

To be singluarly focused, instead of multi-tasking all the time, requires a great deal of discipline, especially if you’re anything like me. My mom brain is so tired from all the laps it’s running. 

You can set aside blocks on your calendar for focused work times, and while they may be a little more like jello and less like cement on the rigidity, it trains your brain to focus in and work hard for that short little burst. You’ll find you’re even more productive.

Spiritual Mom Brain: Time-Scarcity

I find I live in this world of time-scarcity. I feel like I have to do all the things all the time because otherwise I’ll run out of time. It feels like there’s not enough to go around, and I’ll be left wanting if I’m not hustling all the time. 

In the same breath, when I find myself with a chunk of time dedicated to getting stuff done, I feel so overwhelmed by the thoughts of what to do, that I’m almost paralyzed into doing nothing. 

The same is true for our spiritual life. 

When we think about sitting down and focusing on the Bible, or prayer, we have a long list of failed experiments that pop into our brain. There’s that time we ended up playing Candy Crush for 20 minutes instead of in the Bible app. Or the time we fell asleep, head on the table, “praying.” Or all the times we followed our checklist but nothing felt applicable or relevant to real life.

Spiritual Mom Brain: Ideas

There’s no one formula. Just as relationships are all a little different depending on the two people in them, our relationships with God will all look differently. We all relate to the world, the scriptures, to praying and worshipping a little differently, and thats ok. In fact, it’s more than ok. It’s the way we were created. We have a creative God who delights in all the nuances of the world. You were made uniquely you, and no one can tell you just how to experience God. 

For me, some things I’ve found helpful are:

• To journal my prayers. I don’t mean a bullet list of prayer requests, but a word for word writing what I’m thinking. It’s like keeping a diary, but I’m talking to the creator of the universe, not myself or static pages.
• To follow a plan. YouVersion Bible app has reading plans for all seasons of life. Some are short, some are more intensive. Some follow a topic, while others focus on a specific area of the Bible. Scroll through and select one. This helps me fight the “I don’t know where to start so I won’t do anything.”
• I write down at least one scripture from what I read each day. This helps my mind to focus a little deeper on the words on the page, first to be able to select something to write down, and next to continue thinking about it long after I close the Bible. 
• Reading actual pages instead of a screen has been more helpful in certain times of my life. When I’m lacking discipline or feeling stressed by all that’s going on, a Bible app is quickly minimized to move on to other things, and before I know it, I don’t have time to read the bible. Going back to basics and removing screens helps me focus when I’m stressed. 
• Listening to the Word of God – both in an audio version of the bible and through biblically-based music, activates another sense and allows me to dig in deeper. I find I can do repetitive chores (folding clothes, unloading the dishwasher, sweeping the floor) while I listen, which helps the words to sink in with my learning style. This helps me consume a lot more of the Bible. I love the Dwell bible app for this. They also have plans. 
• Illustration also helps me meditate on the words I’m reading. I can ask myself, what symbolizes what the Bible is saying here, or what imagery is the Bible using to make a point? 
• Journaling out my thoughts – typically through a keyboard – can help me to get to the heart of the message and what is really speaking to me in my current events.
• Setting a block on my calendar for time in the Word
• Accountability and friends to text what you’re learning. 

Does mom brain affect your time with God, too? What have you found helpful in your pursuit of God?